Friends for a Reason, a Season, or Life 🤝

Friends for a Reason, a Season, or Life

As you get older, you start to realize that not every friendship is meant to last forever, and as you continue to get older the more okay you become with that reality. That reality can free up expectations, as well as lead to gratitude for the friendships that stand the test of time, and in no way should lead to comparison of others. Some friends come into your life for a specific reason, some stick around for a season, and a few? They're in it for the long haul. The key is knowing which is which and appreciating each type for what it brings to your life. This framework has been helpful for me and has freed me up to appreciate the people the Lord has brought into my life, regardless of where they land. 

I've found it helpful to have words to describe the different friendship roles that have been played in my life. Here are the three types of friendships I've experienced:

Reason Friends

Reason friends come into your life for a specific purpose. Maybe you work together, play on the same rec league team, or see each other at the gym every week. You might sit next to each other in the office or be in the same small group at church. The connection is real, but it's built on shared circumstances. And once that shared reason fades, so does the friendship—and that's completely normal.

These friendships are easy to form. They're fun, casual, and usually pretty plentiful. You don't have to stress about keeping them going long-term. Enjoy them for what they are, and don't feel guilty when they naturally fade. They served a purpose, and that's enough.

Season Friends

Season friends go deeper. These friendships define different chapters of your life, like college roommates, business partners, and fellow young parents running on coffee and two hours of sleep. You're connected by proximity and shared experiences that shape you. You won't have as many of these friendships as reason friends, but they're incredibly valuable. They provide a sense of belonging and help you navigate pivotal seasons of life. But when that season shifts, things like graduation and a job change, and kids grow up, the friendship might also change.

Some seasons, friends turn into life friends, but many don't. That doesn't make them any less valuable.

Life Friends

Then there are the rare few: life friends. These friendships last not because they're convenient but because both people are willing to put in the effort. They require intentionality, sacrifice, and the ability to grow together through life's changes. Life friends are formed when both parties pursue something much bigger than themselves.

These are the people who know your history, your quirks, and your blind spots. They celebrate your wins and walk with you through your losses. They're not just there for a reason or a season—they're in it for the long haul. And here's the thing: You won't have many life friends. No one does. But the ones you do have? They're priceless and deserve to be cherished.

The Balance

For a long time, I thought every friendship was supposed to last forever. I held on too tightly to reason with friends and felt confused when season friends faded. But the truth is, friendships serve different purposes—and that's actually a good thing. Here is a little summary:

• Reason friends are plentiful and serve a purpose—embrace them without expectation. Friendships in this bucket matter, learn to love them with nothing in return.   

• Season friends are fewer but deeply meaningful—appreciate them while they last. Friendships in this bucket require attention, communication, and some expectations. The difference is that you must learn to communicate your expectations, but these friendships are worth it. Learn to appreciate these friends, and remember to give and take.

• Life friends are rare, so prioritize them. Friendships in this bucket require intentionality; more times than not, these have stood the test of time (something you can't simulate). There is a bigger vision you are pursuing alongside them. Hold on to these friendships, and consistently thank the Lord for them by name. Serve your life, and friends, and be the initiator of the relationship.

Proverbs 17:17 says, "A friend loves at all times." No matter what kind of friendship you're experiencing, the more significant takeaway is to love the people in your life. Show up for them.

Support them. Ask yourself what you can give, not just what you can get. Be an initiator in all!

And as always, at The Yo Pro, we're here to help you navigate your world as you navigate the World. Let us know how we can help.

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